Blog: Missing my brother

Congratulations universe, you win. I miss my brother.

Kevin Bays, a 19 year-old “adult” has now started his freshman year in college. In order to receive benefits to avoid just about any loans for college, he joined the army. Sure, he joined it to be in the army reserves band, but he still had to go through the same boot camp as everyone else. I insisted throughout the whole summer that I didn’t miss him. I don’t think I really did. But when I saw him after he came home, everything changed. I knew that Kevin was a different person when he willingly gave me a hug for the first time in years.

I never felt like I had a close relationship with my brother. Kevin and I had completely different interests. He was into band, I was into drama. He couldn’t understand why I would spend hours watching plays on the computer, and I couldn’t understand why he would spend hours listening to saxophone music. Honestly, by the time he left, I hated the sound of the saxophone.

I always felt a little overshadowed by Kevin. He seemed more popular than me, and he always seemed to know what he was doing. It also felt like that once he met friends of mine they would immediately become better friends with him. Kevin had better grades than I did. He was more confident.

Kevin and I rarely, if ever, got along. We would get in arguments about anything and everything. It usually ended with Kevin putting me in a headlock. He also had an insufferable habit of calling me “Scottles.”
Don’t get me started on how his friends treated me once he told them of my nickname.

However, times are changing. Kevin and I aren’t children anymore. He is 19, and I am almost 17. I think Kevin and I both matured over the past summer, and now it feels like I have a real brother. Hopefully, I can get to know him better. Kevin was never very open about how he was feeling.

When I think about it though, Kevin and I had some ways of getting along. I would often watch him play video games, and sometimes we would watch The Office together. We worked together in five musicals, him in the orchestra and me on stage. Once, we even auditioned for RenFair together, though we didn’t get in. Kevin had a way of staying calm in stressful situations, so when I was freaking out, he would try and calm me down.

This is my first year in grade school that I am not sharing with my brother. I can fully admit that I miss him now. Though we never had that close relationship I always wanted from a brother, hopefully that can change. Kevin is going out into the world, and I wish him the best.
After all, he’s the only brother I have, and I love him.

Print Friendly

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *